What if ‘check your privilege’ isn’t about justice at all? What if it’s just another way to keep us fighting each other instead of the system?” To keep us deafened to our collective wisdom?

Like something designed not to empower us but to keep us divided, distracted, and ultimately powerless?

Yes, on paper, it’s about raising awareness of social advantages. But in practice? More often than not, it just shuts people down— the very people who actually understand how privilege works.

If we throw “check your privilege” at someone and then refuse to engage, what are we really doing? Are we challenging privilege, or are we just gatekeeping it? Because let’s be real—some people use it less as a tool for awareness and more like a reflexive mute button for dissenting views. A way to erase someone from the conversation entirely.

I get it—there’s a battle over the narrative. But if we want real democracy, we have to co-author that narrative. That means listening. That means engaging—even when it’s uncomfortable.

And if we don’t find a way to cooperate, where does that leave us? Trapped in echo chambers, talking only to the people who already agree with us. That doesn’t make us smarter—it makes us smaller.”

What If We Used Privilege Differently?

Instead of shutting people down, what if we invited them in? What if we encouraged people with privilege to share what they know—how power actually works, how the system benefits them, where the loopholes and blind spots are? Wouldn’t that be far more useful for dismantling oppressive structures and mindsets than just ending the conversation - in the most dehumanizing way, because “check your privlege” also doubles as “your opinions don’t matter and never matter.”

This isn’t about coddling anyone. It’s about strategy. About building bridges instead of burning them down just to watch the flames.

Because let’s be clear: If we keep turning every conversation into a battle of moral purity instead of a chance to understand and change the system, we’re playing right into the hands of those who benefit from our division.

I don’t know about you, but I have zero interest in stroking my ego if it means torching whatever’s left of our ability to work together. The values we’re trying to protect? They won’t mean a damn thing if we descend into civil war.

So let’s have real conversations—not purity tests. Open hearts, not just sharpened swords.

What do you think?

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Dear “Nice” Straight Men

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Chaos for Breakfast: Survival Guide for the Sanity-Challenged